In Remembrance.

Monday, October 15th, has been appropriately deemed by Congress as Pregnancy & Infant Loss Day. The statistics are staggering.

• "Miscarriage, technically called spontaneous abortion, is
  defined as the loss of a pregnancy before the 20th week. It has been estimated to occur in 15-20% of all pregnancies. The actual number, however, is probably more like 50%. Many miscarriages occur very quickly, going unnoticed before a women is even aware that she's pregnant. More than 80% of miscarriages occur in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy. Of these early miscarriages, at least half are thought to be caused by problems with the fetus' chromosomes."
• "Prematurity is the major cause of infant loss, especially in very low birth weight babies that are under 3 pounds. They account for nearly 1-2% of births and approximately half of all neonatal deaths. Fatal birth defects account for about 3% of all infant losses. Incompetent medical procedures and delivery practices also make up less than 1% of infant losses. But no estimate is perfect. Some babies suddenly get sick and die unexpectedly; others defy all odds."
• "Pregnancy and Infant Loss is often called the 'Hidden Loss' or the 'Unspeakable Loss' because of societies reluctance to recognize these losses and the grief that comes with them as "real" (italics mine). Unfortunately some of us know first hand the pain of loosing a baby during or shortly after pregnancy is very real and we do miss
  and grieve our babies (italics mine)." WebsiteReferenced

Some of you have never, and will never know the pain of loosing an infant or a pregnancy. Others know the pain all too well, and if you don't, sadly perhaps someday you will. The raw pain deep inside, longing for the child you so prayerfully anticipated. This day is for you. For us. For anyone and everyone out there who has experienced the loss of a pregnancy or infant. I post this in remembrance of my two losses. The first miscarriage, diagnosed at 12 weeks,
July 30th 2005, quickly became realized August 2nd. The second miscarriage was much quicker, occurring on November 14th, just only a few months later at only 5 weeks. Reliving the losses, and re-reading the posts is somewhat painful, but even while I read what I wrote in those vulnerable times of sorrow, I am encouraged. The word hope was abundant. And that is exactly right. Hope that God is so much bigger than what he allows us to go through and see, and that ultimately he has something in store for us that will knock our socks off! So, on Monday October 15th at 7 p.m., I will light 2 candles for the babies I mourn. But those two candles will also represent hope for what the Lord can and has done through me because of what he allowed me to go through. I will light my candles in thankfulness. Thankfulness for my two beautiful children. And I will light my candles for subsequent pregnancies...not only for me, but for others around me. The Lord is good. More than good. He gets it right every time with us. He has blessed me with two beautiful boys. He has blessed you in different ways, perhaps. But he has blessed you. If nothing else, light your candle at 7 p.m. October 15th for no
other reason but that.