Seriously. I can't even believe what my nervous fingers are about to type. And the only phrase running through my mind is "are you kidding me?" Because, in all actuality, what I'm about to type cannot be anything but a joke. A sick joke. Now, I'm a little hesitant to share this. Okay I'm hard-core embarrassed. And there's really no introduction for a dialogue like this so, here goes.
GABE-(Saturday morning) "Mommy you can stick a toothbrush up your butt to help you poop"
ME- Uh...no thanks Gabe. We don't do things like that (at least I think I said something along those lines...I'm still too shocked to remember).
And just when I thought it couldn't get worse than that, tonight as I was putting him to bed he says, "Mommy, I'm gonna beat you and shove a screw driver up your butt." Excuse me??? I could not believe me ears. WHERE did he hear that? WHY did he say that??? My little boy....saying such crude, disgusting things. I immediately started holding back tears as I explained to him that we don't talk like that, and that it makes mommy very sad when he says things like that to me (after asking him where he heard that/why he would say something like that).
So the whole reason for posting this (because I'm way too embarrassed about this to post it for amusement purposes) is...is this kind of talk normal for an almost 3 year old???? Where on EARTH would he get something like that?? And could it stem from his very traumatic rectal exam he just had last week???? I mean, come on. That kind of talk is just not acceptable! For the life of me I just can't think where he would hear something like that, because I cannot fathom in my mind how my innocent 3 year old could conjure up something like that in his own little head. I am literally in tears over this!!!
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Are you kidding me???
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5 comments:
Micah has said some pretty interesting/alarming things. When he was two, and I'd tell him "I love you," his response was more often than not "I DON'T LOVE YOU!" This is generally a bad thing to say to your post-partum hormonal mother. He's also mentioned on more than one occasion things like "I don't want to follow God's direction, only my own direction," As his understanding of the world grows, his thoughts get less alarming and more reassuring. The "butt" references are pretty normal, I think. My kids have a weird fascination with their various holes and parts, I think it's just something they're curious about. As for the beating thing, it's shocking, absolutely, but you never know where he could have heard something like that, a commercial on tv, some older kids talking in passing on a walk or at the park. Kids hear stuff that we don't always pick up on. I think you responded well, you made him understand that that was hurtful and unacceptable, but it doesn't seem like you made a colossal deal out of it, (which I think sometimes has the opposite affect you're looking for). He might not have even realized that it was so hurtful- he might have just thought it would be silly to say screwdriver and butt in the same sentence.
That being said, if he keeps coming out with things like that, I'd definitely try to figure out where it's coming from.
Three year olds are fun. However shocking and/or mortifying they can be at times, just keep reminding yourself- "It only lasts a year...4 is coming." :)
poor Jess.
I think talk about anatomy is completely normal for this age (did you read Kelly's blog about why girls don't have a penis?), and with the rectal exam he had I'm not so shocked he's on that train of thought.
So personally I wouldn't worry about it, as horrible as it may sound to you right now, it's most likely just a phase.
Oh...another thing, a forum I read had a thread about kids freaking them out, and it seems 3-5 y/os can say some pretty disturbing things, but most agree it's just the way they process things they hear/see .
Well, with Jadon's shocking behavior lately, I can honestly say that a conversation like that has not happened...thankfully. But, we are very protective about what he sees and hears (not saying that you're not), because we have noticed his tendency to quickly and repetitively repeat things (usually only the bad things)...I don't believe this to be normal 3-year-old behavior, no...at least not from a child with a limited environment from which he would likely had to have heard those things. Again, not saying you or anyone else here isn't protective or whatever...just that it's the only possible thing we, personally, can credit as to why we haven't heard something like that from him (*yet*).
Anyway, he has said some pretty off the wall stuff, but not as disturbing at the screwdriver comment...hopefully you get to the bottom of it (seriously, no pun intended), and if it continues, I would SERIOUSLY reccommend a trip to the dr to see if they can help or refer you to someone who can. You don't want this to continue for so long that it becomes a nightmare to break him of...we have taken Jadon in several times strictly for behavior issues, ourselves...keep us posted...
Aw- Jess, I wouldn't worry your self too much. I haven't raised boys, but I did grow up with two brothers, one of which I helped "mother", and they both said troubling things at times. I hear stories that Morgan did too. They have all three turned out to be Godly men.
I would, however, as has already been said, keep the dialogue open and your eyes and ears peeled to see if he's hearing this anywhere.
Most importantly, as my mother reminds me all the time, prayer is a mother's best resource. I will help you pray about this, as I know this is very troubling. I would be freaking out too!
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