There is a message I must share.

I can't sleep. I toss and turn in bed next to my husband, envious of the sleep he is so peacefully getting. Sleep eludes me. Tragedy fills my mind. So much tragedy. Why do terrible things have to happen to good people? To not-so-good people? While I know things happen to both the just and the un-just, why does God's allowance seem more un-just than just sometimes? Perhaps I've just been watching too much T.V., but the fact remains...it hasn't been just on T.V. I have been affected by tragedy. Stories of rape, abuse, murder, suicide, and death; numerous in-human acts, countelss victims...and even worse, their preditors and captors. My heart hurts for such as these. So much so that sleep is lost on me as I review gruesome details in my head, unable to stop the threat of tears as I realize these are real people. People with souls, hopes, dreams, family, friends...years left un-lived, because of sick, psychotic people, or nature's harsh cruelty.

Discernment. This gift I do possess, and sometimes it seems like more of a burden than a gift. Mercy...this too, I know full well. The desire to erase all pain and suffering. To take one's hurt upon yourself, and in desiring to do so...actually doing it. It hurts. Compassion. Actively seeking to meet the needs of those who suffer. All too familiar to me.

Why? Why must I be forced to feel another's hurt? Understanding is granted to me when it is someone I know...but what about those I've never met? What about faces I see, refined from the painful fiery in-justices that sometimes come our way...faces that I am unable to forget...and that are forever etched in my memory. "Why must I care so much? Why must my heart ache within, and tears blurr my vision for the hurting and the lost," I cry in anguish. And then the answer comes. Not in a loud thunder, not in a strong wind. But in a gentle wisper.

"Because I died so you could. Because I too suffered and felt the pain of each and every single person to ever walk the face of this earth. I felt the sting of hot tears against My cheeks for those who hurt, for those who suffer, for those who would despise Me to their grave, who would die deaths without ever knowing Me, who would face the most inhumane acts to ever be forced upon another creature. Because I rose again to take it all away someday. And that day will come for those who believe in Me. But for now I am sending you. Feel their pain as I once did...as I do now. Weep for those who weep. I did. I do." Open your eyes to the world around you. Not as you once saw it. Look deeper. It's there...an invisible world of pain, suffering, and shame. Feel with them. Allow My Spirit to gift you with the most painful, and yet extremely rewarding gift, the gift of feeling. The gift of taking anothers hurt upon your shoulders. The painful gift of bearing a weight on your heart seemingly too heavy to bear. The rewarding gift of releasing it unto My care, once you've become the person in pain, and allowing Me to nurse your broken heart. This is a high calling. Some are called to suffer for Me. You are one of them. All are called to share in my sufferings...go and do likeweise."

Now sleep will come.