Here he/she is! Clocking in at 5 weeks 4 days. You can't actually SEE a baby yet, but there's a baby in there....somewhere.....I assure you. The doctor seems to think everything is fine, but he would have broken precedence if he hadn't sent me home with, "well you could be nine months pregnant and you're still not in the clear." Thanks doc. But I am beginning to relax a little more and start to actually be excited about this pregnancy! I go back in 2 weeks for another ultrasound which will put me at 8 weeks, and if everything is still fine, then for sure there will be a baby to see by then. So far things have been hectic here on this end. I've been busy babysitting children, and running all over the place for the Greater Ohio District. No complaints about that, however.
"Morning sickness," has now become my new best friend. It's an interesting paradigm. I have a love/hate relationship with my new friend. Don't like how she makes me feel, but LOVE why she's around. Yesterday was a bad day, but today is a better one. I haven't actually tossed my cookies yet, but boy I've been close.
And here's a question....how in the world do you explain to the six-year-old you're watching that you're going to throw up right now if we don't leave the park immediately???
And so as of now, the countown begins until I'm finished babysitting for the year. The kids are great, the pay is even better (I'm really gonna miss THAT.......and the kids too! Sheesh.), but in all honesty, (and I feel like the hugest dork for saying this) I can't handle it! I cannot handle other peoples children! I can handle my own, and I can handle yours for a LIMITED amount of time, but.....four days a week, 8-6 is really killing me. And what really gets me is that I know a TON of other moms that do it. But I can't. I just can't. And I feel guily for saying it...like there's something wrong with me. I could have 10 Gabes and love it....but I would never want 10 of another person's kids. Do you moms who babysit.....can you relate to this maddness?? Or am I alone in this? So anways, like I said. I do love the kids, but emotionally and physically I'm wiped. PLUS now that I'm beginning to get sick and tired it hasn't been all fun and games like some would assume. And I feel like Gabe is missing out on his mommy. I'm not able to spend the time with him that I want to spend, and he's coming up on some major milestones soon, such as the potty, and a big boy bed. I need to be rested, alert, and ready to handle this boy, who takes most of my energy all by his little self :)
And I was just thinking about the fact that I'm going to have another little one here soon, and while I'm thrilled....I'm a little sad. Sad that time alone with my Gabe will be ending soon :( But isn't it going to be something for him to have a sibling? He might hate it at first, but once he realizes mommy is still his mommy too, then I know he's going to love it!
So anyways, I'm done babysitting sometime in June I think. Why does that seem like such a long time away???? Oh wait.....it IS a long time away *sigh*
Oh and some more good news....tonight hubs and I are going on a date!!!! A date!!! Still can't believe it myself :) We haven't been on a date in like....well never mind how long. Let's just say we're long overdue!!!! I'm going on a date! I'm going on a date!
Oh my gosh......what am I going to wear????
3 comments:
YAY! I've been waiting for you to post how the u/s went! I'm so excited for you! and I understand your relationship with morning sickness (who was it that called it that anyway? it lasts all day and we all know it) - and every time someone says "well at least it means your baby is healthy" i want to throw up...on them...lol. I'm so excited for you Jess!
Congrats Jess - I've been a little behind on my blog reading so I just heard your news TODAY!!
I'll be praying for you as well! The more the merrier :)
My sister is pregnant too. She's been through situations very similar to yours as well - so it's fun to watch God working miracles!!
Found your blog through Kayla's. I was prob. on my way out of BBC when you guys were there, but I know who you are, even if you have no clue who I am. (Kristi Wilson, married Andrew Benson)
Don't feel guilty for not being able to watch other people's kids.
A. I was a personal nanny for a well to do family when I became prego with our 1st. Great, fantastic, gift from God family that I worked for. However, I was horribly horribly sick all day long from the exact moment I woke up to the exact moment I fell asleep. This made everything from driving to work (will I suddenly barf while driving and wreck?), to making playdates, and going on outings with 1 toddler and 1 baby, much more complicated. I ended up having a hard time keeping up and we all agreed 'twas best if I stopped working at around 6 mo. All was well, but it was obvious the pregnancy was exhausting me, along with the 'morning' sickness, the loss of weight, etc...
B. Fast forward to AFTER my daughter was born. I thought, I can do that again, this time watch kids in my home. May as well get paid to stay home with Mya. Long, long story short - I quit. While my first experience had been with a fab family and kids, the second wasn't. The struggles were NOT worth it.
All that to say, I am with you. I have no desire to watch other's kids, unless I know you really really really well, let alone doing it while prego.
Girl you need your rest. Don't feel guilty for it! Enjoy Gabe and don't feel guilty for slowing down the pace. A mother needs her sanity after all.
Post a Comment